DIRTY ROTTEN FIRST DAY BACK

Michael and I spend the night in Toronto for a variety of reasons, not the least of which being that it is actually cheaper for us to get a hotel and airport direct transport than it is to get both of us to the airport from Niagara at crack-of-my-ass-o'clock in the morning.

The airport, at 5:30 a.m. is a 3 ring circus. Although our flights (Michael is on a different one that me) are through United Airlines, the plane is an Air Canada flight....bottom line is we get the run-around from both companies because no one knows where we should check in. (This lack of communication and direction eventually causes two of the cast members to miss their flight completely and end up spending the night in Las Vegas).

Michael heads off to his gate. I do the same (after much negotiation with airline personnel). The cast starts to dribble in. Because we are going to a very small airport in Fresno, we are all split onto 5 or 6 different flights, leaving at different times during the day and connecting through different cities. The rest of the cast on my flight begins to arrive. We find out that we are delayed by 60 minutes....it is only 8:30 a.m. and I have been up for 4 hours.

We finally leave Toronto on what is, apparently, the "Family Day" flight. Anyone who thinks that we're in a recession should take a flight somewhere. How short of money can you be if you can travel with your 3 or 4 children in tow. There are at least 10 families, all of them large, on the plane. Few of us are able to sleep.

Our connection is through Las Vegas. As we are an hour behind schedule, we have to hustle to get to the other terminal at Vegas airport, only to find that our departure from that gate is also delayed. When our plane does arrive, I am forced to point and laugh. It is a twin prop. tuna can with wings, holding perhaps 20 people. Our Stage Manager pales.

Regardless of how you feel about flying in small planes, (Heather kept clutching me arm every time we banked) there is no better way to view the beautiful Sierra Nevada Mountains. We are stunned at the spectacular views.

We arrive at Fresno and are forced to endure another delay, this one spent filling our forms because none of our luggage made it on to the plane and is still in Las Vegas. By the time we arrive at the hotel, I have been awake and travelling for 12 hours and proceed directly to the lobby lounge without even going to my room. Of course, there's no need to go to the room when one has no luggage. We hear several rumours about possible arrival times for our bags, none of them true. They finally arrive around 10 a.m. the next morning. The hotel doesn't bother to call anyone to let them know, they just stow the bags with the bellman and wait for us to call, one by one.

We hear that Heather has put her neck out at some point during the night and won't be doing the show, so we are in understudy mode. Fortunately, there is a 4 hour rehearsal call that was already scheduled simply because we've had 3 weeks off.

I guess you could say we're back on the road.....with a vengeance.

The adventure continues.