End of the first week of rehearsals in London and I spent the day off moving. There was a shortage of housing and I had to wait for "The Graduate" to close so that I could move into the place where I will now live until Dec. 30. My new home is a marked improvement from my last one where there was no stove/oven, no bed (only a futon which doubled as the couch) and there wasn't really a bathroom to speak of, only a sink, toilet and shower installed in the laundry room. So, when you sit on the toilet, you not only have you knees under the sink, you are also sitting next to the furnace. This is what $100.00 a week gets you. My new place has an actual bed in it's own room, an actual bathroom with a spacious shower and a lovely kitchen that I share with the homeowner. And....there is a GoodLife gym 3 blocks away and an Irish pub with free wireless internet about 5 blocks away (this is a minor miracle since London seems completely uninterested in wireless internet connections in it's public spaces).

B & B RIDES AGAIN

Rehearsals have started for The Grand's production of "Beauty & The Beast" in London. The show is going to look amazing. The set and costume designers (Judith Bowden and John Dinning) have allowed themselves to be inspired by the great illustrators Maxfield Parrish and Edmond Dulac. Everything is very, very rich, colorful, detailed, lush , textured and full of fairy-tale touches.

DISNEY STRIKES AGAIN

I leave for London tomorrow to start rehearsals for "Beauty & The Beast" at The Grand on Tuesday. Once again into the fray of Disney-fied happiness. Though I am hoping that because this theatre company understands the value of rehearsal time and takes it's art and it's performers seriously, there may actually be a more meaningful show the ends up being unearthed this time. Oh, and did I mention a director that knows how to direct?

Bodyworlds

Went to see the BODYWORLDS exhibit at the Vancouver Science Centre today. I admit that I did have some brief, minor moments of squeemishness when I remembered that these were actual bodies that I was looking at. Overall, however, what I took away from the exhibit was two things: One, that we are really very small creatures when you look at us in a purely physical sense, and fairly fragile too. And two, without an energizing force in the body, animating it, giving it reason and context in it's environment, it is only a body, a lump of protein and water that might just as easily be a bowl of pudding. So......what IS that energizing force? When will they be able to plastinate a soul?

Full Circle

I'm feeling a sort of 'full-circle-ness' from being in Vancouver. Not two blocks from where I'm staying is the old Tivoli theatre (it's coffee place now, like every piece of prime real estate in Vancouver) but it's also the place where I saw "The Rocky Horror Show" when it first came out in the late 70's when I was living here. ....and now I've played the lead on stage. Also, I had lunch today with an old friend with whom I did a production of "Bent" years ago in Calgary. (I mean...many years ago...probably 1986 or 87). So here's the question I ponder.....if you are re-visiting things from so long ago, does this mean you have come full circle and its time to move on, or is it time to learn the things you didn't learn the first time around?

SHORTBUS

I just saw John Cameron Mitchell's new film, "SHORTBUS" and I'm totally impressed. I think he's really broken new ground and created something quite extraordinary. Though the film has been sensationalized for it's graphic sex that IS NOT simulated, what the characters end up revealing is far more interesting. And what the actors end up revealing is much much more than their physical parts. For me, the intense honesty of some of the scenes, the total openess of the performers was far more humbling and even more uncomfortable than the release of some fluids on screen.

This film is a brilliant study of our search for intimacy & acceptance and our own realization that it never comes from anyone but ourselves.

ROLLERBLADING BY THE SEA

I made a realization today as I was rollerblading the sea-wall around Stanley Park. Even though I grew up land-locked, I have always loved being near or, better yet, in the ocean. Today, however, I realized that its more than just wanting to be near it, I only feel complete when I'm near it. Its as though I have an extra limb that can only survive in the salt water and it waits for me to return to it again and again so that the final piece of me can be re-attatched once more.

I'M WITH STUPID

Ok. So, I have a new favourite stupid question:
"Do you have anything else...like....other than what's on the menu?"
This question was asked AFTER I had told them about the daily specials.

Here are my two possible answers:
1) "If we had anything else, don't ya think we'd have put it ON the menu?"
2) "Yes. Yes we do have other things. But not for you."

As the signature on my email reads now:
"It's not that I think stupidity should be punishable by death, I just think we should take the warning labels off of everything and let the problem work itself out."

IDIOTS WITH PASSPORTS

I have a week and a half left at the restaurant, the weather is cooler, the week-day tourists seem to be fewer, but the general level of stupidity remains at a constant high. I could barely restrain myself the other day when someone said to me, "Sir, are these menu prices in American or Canadian?" Through gritted teeth, I replied, "Funnily enough, when you crossed the border, EVERYTHING became Canadian!!" Also still getting our fair share of French, German and Dutch tourists who seem to be able to read enough english to navigate the menu but can't quite figure out what GRATUITY NOT INCLUDED means.

GIFT CARDS

I just saw an article about the government of ontario planning to legislate the expiration of gift cards. See, most of them expire about 18 months after their purchase date and it would seem that there are soooooo many lazy, empty, stupid, shiftless idiots out there that just can't seem to find the time to spend that money in a mere YEAR AND A HALF !!!!!!!!! JeZuz Bouncy-Balls-Christe people!!! Can't we do ANYTHING without having to have it LEGISTLATED? Get a grip! Someone gives you a gift card, you go redeem the fucker. Live a little. This has nothing to do with consumer protection or anyone's RIGHTS. It has everything to do with turning off the fucking television and going out into the world to actually buy the thing instead of just staying at home and watching pictures of it.

MAKIN' THE DOUGH

I have three weeks left at the restaurant and, due to the fact that tourism has been in the crapper all year, I have to make a WHACK of money in the time I have left. I have set a goal of making $1,000.00 this week...

Also, I've been thinking a lot about our wedding since, for some reason, as the anniversary date approached, the universe conspired to send many bell-laden, horse-drawn wedding carriages down the street in front of the restaurant. Mostly, when I think of that day one year ago, I remember all of the people who came to celebrate with us. It's a memory I'll use, like a warm blanket, for many years.

HALLOWEEN CRAP

I was in the Dollarama today, buying cheap dish cloths, and was sickened by all the cheap Halloween crap. Whole walls and entire aisles have been devoted to plastic buckets, wall hangings, streamers, 'centre pieces', candles, candle holders, bags, and on and on and on.....AND ALL OF IT WILL GET USED ONCE AND THEN GET THROWN AWAY.

Where is the value in any of it? Where is the meaning? What is the reason to have any of it?

We have all been programed by the holiday marketing companies.
"That's it, goood little consumers. Keep buying, now throw it out, now buy some more, now throw it out.....good consumers."

GOD HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT

I'm doing a coaching promotion at the local CURVES fitness centre for women. One of the staff members told me that a woman mentioned that she was interested in coaching but didn't feel right about pursuing it because she felt that it was un-christian. UNCHRISTIAN!!!! Her reasoning? Because god has a plan for us and we should let his plan unfold for us rather than trying to live the life we want. How fucking sad is that??? Somebody sold this woman a whole wagon load of snake oil and she bought it all. What I'd really like to explain to her is that radical Muslims who think it's OK to kill her because she's an infidel think that THEIR god has a plan for them too.

WOW. NICE PEOPLE. WHO KNEW?

I haven't made an entry for quite some time, and so this seems, somehow, like a fitting entry to make. Especially since I've been so busy at the restaurant.

I know I complain a lot about the ignorance, rudeness and shear stupidity of people, and for the most part, it's like that every day. But I worked a private function tonight, a wedding rehearsal dinner, and I have to say they were delightful. They were plain folk, mind. Lamb curry scared them and most of them had never seen a chicken crepe, but they were the happiest, most thankful, most polite bunch of people. They made the evening pretty stress-free for my colleague and I. And, the mother of the groom left a super-sized tip!!!!!

I hope they have a fantastic wedding day tomorrow....

and I hope that the rest of the usual suspects that I deal with on a day to day basis continue to be plagued with car trouble and mysterious skin ailments.

NO, PLEASE EAT SOME MORE

I know that I may have mentioned the incredible book "Hungry Planet" that I've been reading. I'm still really enjoying it (and, oddly enough, tend to read it most when I'm eating). However, I just read an essay in it that started my one good foot to steppin' up on my soapbox. The woman who wrote it a professor at USC and heads the Center for Diabetes and Endocrinology at Children's Hospital Los Angeles. She states that "...60 per cent of adults - and 30 per cent of children - are overweight or obese." in the United States. No arguement from me, because I've been throwing swill down in front of them all summer.

However, she then goes on to say, "They are the victimes of a society that does not seem to care, of an economic structure that makes it cheaper to eat fries than fruit, of the food industry and the mass media luring them to consume what they shouldn't." Well.....here's where I have a BIG!!!!!!! problem. Oh dear, poor fat things don't know that one litre of soda a day (average for many people) is making them fat. BULL SHIT!! Which is better for you, an apple or a Big Mac? I refuse to believe that people don't honestly know the answer to that question. THey are not victims of some faceless, nameless society, they are victims of their own laziness and lack of responsibility. They are the same people that sued MacDonalds because the coffee was too hot. You wanted maybe a cold coffee ya dumb, greedy, lazy, fuck? Oh poor you, your diabetes is out of control. Perhaps it's because you haven't eaten anything that was alive since 1964.

I suppose it's good in a way. We don't have to worry about anybody trying to start a war on American soil. We just have to stand quietly by while they eat themselves to death.

Bored of mis-spent money

Took advantage of the $35.00 Equity special and went to see "Lord of The Rings" ("Bored of The Rings?") in Toronto yesterday. Wow. And I say that with all the irony I can load it with. Let me be plain...it's incredibly creative and eye-popping from a technological and design stand-point. Truely stunning and innovative. But less than 30minutes into the show, I already knew that I didn't care about a single, solitary character on the stage. Michael put it most succinctly, "What I'll take away is the amazing technology. I won't remember anything about the show."

And just for contrast, later in the evening, we went to see "An Intimate Evening With Cancer", a one-man show by our friends Bruce & Rebecca. So in a matter of hours we went from a 30 million dollar show to a 300 hundred dollar show, and which one do you think had the most emotional impact for us? The cheaper one, of course.

Fascinating, isn't it?

Sue Me

So I didn't complete my census form in a 'timely' fashion and now I get a letter from the census people THREATENING ME WITH FINES AND IMPRISONMENT. What fucking country is this that we're living in again. Someone please remind me.

Somewhere, waaaaaaayyyyy down on my list of things to do on any given day is an item called 'things to do for the government'. My life and all the things in it have always been and will always be more important than your numbers, programs, policies and demands.

I'LL TAKE

I made an interesting observation today. When ordering food, Americans are mostly prone to saying, "I'll take...." as in, "I'll take a salad" or "I'll take the burger." Interesting that it's not a request, as in, "May I have the burger, please" or even, "I'd like a coffee." They're not so much asking you if you would bring them something, they're telling you what it is that will be theirs.

grammar is fascinating, isn't it?

I'LL TAKE

I made an interesting observation today. When ordering food, Americans are mostly prone to saying, "I'll take...." as in, "I'll take a salad" or "I'll take the burger." Interesting that it's not a request, as in, "May I have the burger, please" or even, "I'd like a coffee." They're not so much asking you if you would bring them something, they're telling you what it is that will be theirs.

grammar is fascinating, isn't it?

ALL NUMBERS ARE AMERICAN

Ok, it's gotten to the point where I can't even be mad at the poor, simple, self-absorbed, ego-centric idiots any more. Now, I just feel sorry for them, for how small their worlds are. Time and time again, when I present the bill to a table, I am asked, "Is this in American?"

"Yes. Yes it is. I immediately sensed, when you walked in, the you were from the greatest and most prominent of all nations. Perhaps it was your carriage, maybe your style, or the quiet grace with which you conduct yourself and possibly the dignity and respect you channel when dealing with others. I sensed all of this and knew that, from that point on, all my dealings with you would simply HAVE to be in a foreign currency. Because, you see, even though you have left your country and entered another, we know where you're from and want you to feel as though nothing has changed. When I presented the bill to the French people who were at this table moments ago, I presented it in French Francs. When I presented the bill to the Japanese family, I presented it already calculated into Yen. Of course, they were surprised and grateful for this automatic conversion because they are not used to ALL numbers being converted into AMERICAN like you are. How great it must be to be you."